I was on drugs..that is my excuse and I am sticking to it.....

So one cold November night when my children were fast asleep, my husband was in California and I was recovering from surgery-high on painkillers, I tracked this boy down. You must know that I have a background in tv news and I pride myself on always being able to find someone using my keen spidey sense (news background). I will refrain from saying how I located him, but suffice it to say..I emailed him. I used some lame excuse that I had seen his name while researching something on the internet. I wondering if I would ever hear from him and the next day I had an email waiting for me. He was cordial and kind and seemed genuinely excited to hear from me. That thrilled me. Can you imagine? Track down a long lost love and reconnect. I was so happy. Fast forward a few days--still on painkillers, I emailed him again and actually fessed up as to my true thoughts. Mind you, I am not sure I would have done this if the percocet was not kicking in. So I told him.....the truth.....somewhat. I told him that he had always held a special place in my heart and he was always going to hold that spot....that I just wanted to check on him and make sure he was doing well in life and was OK. Let's just say the next morning...I had the shocking feeling...'WHAT THE HELL DID I DO?"